A good foundation doesn't require any special training or education.
Read More
“To have a friend and be a friend is what makes life worthwhile.” ~Unknown
Read More
BUILD MY LIFE TEAM
“Alone we can do so little, together we can do so much.”
No matter where you are in life, whether you know it or not, you are building a Life Team: the friends and family you like, care about, enjoy the most and, yes, rely upon the most. You don’t wake up one morning to see everyone who matters to you wearing a jersey saying “Your Life Team.” Rather you build it over time.
You decide who belongs on your Life Team. Although many of the relationships important to you are dyads—two-person teams consisting of you and one other person (perhaps you and your significant other)— your broader team can include perhaps seven individuals. They are your team not because you interact with them all of the time, but because they would appear on a list that said “these are the people who matter in my life.” Your list will change. You can think of it as a bit like a “pick up team” in soccer. You may start with your family then add—and scratch out—people as you make your way through youth and adulthood.
Think of your life team as a set of concentric circles. The center of your team is the handful of people closest to you. But then it radiates out to your friends, your extended family, groups you belong to, and an even broader community that you identify with, i.e., feel that you belong to.
Your life team gives you a sense of belonging, a feeling of home where you can “exhale and be your true self.” Building this or any team also builds your “social fitness,” the ability to engage in productive personal and professional relationships. It takes time and energy. It’s a two way street. As you deal with a person in different situations, you get better at interpreting their thoughts from their body language, facial expressions, and what they actually say and do. The more you know the people you relate to, and the more they know you, the stronger the nsense of belonging becomes.
Talking to your coach. Using your own measure of success, once a day or throughout the day tell your coach why you have—or haven’t—worked on your life team today. One success measure might be to ask yourself if you feel loneliness versus the sense of belonging that comes with a life team. Asking yourself what success looks like will stimulate your thinking. Your coach will ask questions, not expecting an answer, but rather to make you aware of cues and reinforcers that drive the habit.
Learn More